Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Is this the End or Intermission?

Expanded Lovemaking, practiced as an art form, is about getting out of our story, and sticking with the processes we learn, through thick and thin.

Yesterday, we had been flirting, doing nice things for each other, rubbing elbows, blowing kisses, and cuddling. I was generally sending out those “come get me signals” all day.

So, when we finally started our Expanded Orgasm date, within moments I was climbing up a staircase of sensation that carried us both along, like a river effortlessly carries a raft with two happy people aboard. My breathing was full and deep and whole-bodied. I spread the sensation to prevent myself from going over the edge too soon. His expert hands were simultaneously like butter and like rubber bands, melting into me and yet pulling me this way and that, confusing me enough to send my body singing into a sweet surrendered song.

Like a symphony filling Music Hall, several sensational crescendos began building perfectly. That is, until my beloved slowed down, suddenly, his touch eking its way over the next two minutes to a draggy drawl.

Okay, how, what, and why? But, by the time I had stopped to ponder as much, my body had come in for a semi-orgasmic landing. I had “gone over a low edge”: going over an edge, but not a truly satisfying, or completely definitive “finale” kind of edge, be it a star-birth, epiphany, magic-carpet ride, or anything that has a name.

We could have put on our best appearances, ending there, grateful for all that we did experience. Hey, let’s just give it two more minutes, he suggested. I agreed, and we started to play again.

Patiently, he lovingly played with my most delicate flower while I did my best to feel anything. I couldn’t. Not two, but rather, five minutes of no feeling must have gone by before suddenly I felt something felt really, really good! And up we went, and up, up, and away from there.

And that’s the real story here. We took our attention off our frustration, and returned to the art of having presence, feeling, connection, and pleasure. Rather than getting stuck, we retuned to our practice, and our art. Did we make totally new and amazing music together? Yes!

And, we learned something new: Low edges do not always mean the end of a date! They may just be a very promising intermission!

Yours in ever-expanding love,
Dr. Patti Taylor

Copyright 2007 Patricia H. Taylor, PhD. All Rights Reserved.

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